"König Prüße" <=?iso-8859-1?Q?K=F6nig=20Pr=FC=DFe?=>; "GfbAEV"
Post by König PrüÃe, GfbAEVPost by Rev. Richard SkullYou are my colostomy bag
My only colostomy bag
I no longer sit down to take shit
you don't know all the time you save meeeee
Please don't take my colostomy bag a way!
I was thinking...
ya know, James Brown is getting kinda old,
so his next hit might be...
"Pappa's Got a Brand New Colostomy Bag"
Great Gawd! Hooo Lawd! Unngh!
"Living With a Hernia"
written by 'Weird Al' Yankovic
Help me out! Dig!
All I do is grunt and groan
Hurts me to walk anywhere
Went to see my physician, Dr. Jones
He took my trousers off, told me to cough
Doctor says there ain't nothin' to discuss
He tells me any day I might have to wear a truss
Living with a hernia
All the time, such aggravation
Living with a hernia
Gonna be my ruination
Living with a hernia
Got to have an operation
Feel so old
Too much bad pain
Good gawd, drives me insane
Can't run, barely crawl
Got a bulge in my intestinal wall
Walk real funny, bless my soul
Can't play tennis and it's hard to bowl
You can't even do the splits now... Say it!
Better call it quits now
Now I'm sick of all this dancin' anyhow
Living with a hernia
Hurts me bad in a tender location
Living with a hernia
Had enough humiliation
Living with a hernia
Got to have an operation
I live with a hernia
Can't get up, can't bend over
Now I live with a hernia
Wait a minute...
You may not be familiar with the common types
Of hernias that you could get
So just settle down, let me clue you in
There's incomplete
Epigastric
Bladder
Strangulated
Lumbar hernia
Richter's hernia
Obstructed
Inguinal and Direct
Living with a hernia...Rupture!
I said it's causin' me such irritation
Living with a hernia
Have to have my medication
Living with a hernia
I feel bad!
--
Paul E. Jamison
"I traveled to a planet with no bilateral symmetry
and all I got was this lousy F-shirt."